Article written by Nardine Collier
Family Lawyer Cairns & Alice Springs

Selling the family home following a separation is often a reality. Like any sale, you want to maximise your sale price.

It is also important to work with an agent who understands that their clients are separated - and it may not be easy to get joint decisions about the sale! The agent will need to be prepared to work with both owners, i.e. husband and wife, separately, and makes sure that each person is involved in making a decision. Often the agent needs to navigate the tensions of separated couples and try and get them to reach an agreement on the sale.

I always suggest to clients that if they can’t agree on an aspect of the sale- that they should agree beforehand to let the agent make the final decision. Bear in mind - the agent also wants the quickest sale at the best possible price!

I contacted Zoe Wicks, an experienced agent who has recently moved back into the Edge Hill area – for her perspective and expert advice on how to sell your property when you have separated:

“When I'm working with a couple who are separating, I'm always very sensitive to the situation and the emotions that are felt by both parties. I am very diligent with my communication; ensuring I keep both parties well informed and that all communication is equal and non-biased. It's important that both parties feel supported and understood, and that they feel safe in my hands – receiving good, solid professional advice.

Having a strong leadership approach is important when selling a property for a separated couple, as delays in agreement can negatively affect the sale outcome.

Often these properties may have been neglected because both parties have moved out, or there have been disputes with money, a shortage of money, or sometimes purely from the owners dealing with the overwhelm of emotions and life changes. Amongst everything else they are having to deal with – the home maintenance falls on the wayside. I take a lot of time and care in helping to best prepare the home for sale behind the scenes, before we go to market. This process can often be quite long and challenging (depending on the situation), but is absolutely essential in achieving the highest possible price for the owners.

Right now, the property market wheels are still turning; they may be turning slower, but they are still turning.  Having a roof over our heads is essential, we still need places to live, to call home - for each new chapter and season of our lives.

I'm definitely feeling that with the advent of what's happening in the world- people are reassessing their values, favouring less populated areas, healthier environments, nature & self-sustainability, lifestyle, and warmer climates- which are all positives for us living in Cairns.

I feel there is a renewed interest in Cairns from southern & international buyers for these reasons.  The simple life has come back into fashion; be that by forced external factors combined with new internal drivers.  First home buyers have a strong presence in the market as there are good value properties to be snapped up, coupled with low interest rates and Government loan incentives.  Second or third home buyers are in the market as well- they are taking their time to buy, but jumping when they find a property they love.  Investors are also looking to buy property in the Cairns area, as the return on investments are still very competitive and better then what the banks can offer- even with the downward pressure on rental prices.  The low entry level prices allow investors to spread their risk.”

It is great to hear that in Zoe’s opinion- the property market is still viable, and it is possible to get a good price for your property! For more tips, check out Zoe Wicks Real Estate’s 101 tips to maximise your sales price here.

With thanks to: Zoe Wicks, LREA | Zoe Wicks Real Estate |   Ph: 0477 114 778   |   Email: zoewicks@atrealty.com.au

Nardine Collier is a Nationally Accredited Mediator and has been mediating Family Law disputes for over 25 years. She is a Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner, a Family Law Arbitrator, a panel Mediator for various Australia wide organisations and for courts and tribunals. Nardine regularly mediates at Legal Aid conferences in Family Law, in Cairns and Alice Springs. She is also the Cairns Representative of the Queensland Chapter of the Resolution Institute of Australia.

Article written by Nardine Collier
Family Lawyer Cairns & Alice Springs

I read an interesting article last week, entitled: 'When Coronavirus lockdowns ended in cities across China last month, there was one thing a lot of people couldn’t wait to do: get divorced.' Here is the link to the article: https://www.mamamia.com.au/relationship-tips-covid-19

Apparently, the Global Times reported that there has been a “record-high number of divorce requests in recent weeks” in the Chinese city of Xi’an. The article wonders whether the same might happen in Australia, when couples are forced to spend more time together then they are used to.

Then a colleague sent me this image; - which I found funny, only because it pokes fun at Lawyers, and I think sometimes we need that.

It did cross my mind if there would be more separations as a result of the virus, and if there is - there is nothing funny about that. One reason certainly could be that spending so much time together causes the cracks in the relationship to appear. What is perhaps more likely, is the terrible financial impact this virus is having on Australian families and the tension this will bring to a relationship.

I have seen lots of jokes on social media about how alcohol consumption has increased for many; again, for many this is no joke and it will be the issue that brings a relationship to an end.  Depression over a lost job, fear about finances, increased drinking and/or drug taking – it’s a recipe for disaster with a great concern being the increase of family violence.

If you feel your relationship is floundering since the outbreak, what can you do?

• • Talk to each other about it
  • Get help! You can still access counselling services online or over the phone. There is also a lot of help out there to assist those who are struggling financially -  head to https://www.servicesaustralia.gov.au/ for more.
  • Be Safe – not just from the virus but from dangerous situations. If you are worried about family violence, call the police.
  • Seize the opportunities for quality time with your family, that you may not have had before
  • Hang in there – this won’t last forever.

If you really feel as if your relationship is at an end and you don’t know what to do, call us. We can help.

Nardine Collier is a Nationally Accredited Mediator and has been mediating Family Law disputes for over 25 years. She is a Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner, a Family Law Arbitrator, a panel Mediator for various Australia wide organisations and for courts and tribunals. Nardine regularly mediates at Legal Aid conferences in Family Law, in Cairns and Alice Springs. She is also the Cairns Representative of the Queensland Chapter of the Resolution Institute of Australia.

Article written by Nardine Collier
Family Lawyer Cairns & Alice Springs

In times of crisis, parents have to work together like never before. I say it all the time, co-parenting after separation is very hard, but I have just seen it become even more so in the face of so much uncertainty and fear. Things are changing daily and parents are understandably very concerned about the safety of their children in this crisis.

Here are my top tips for Parenting in a Pandemic (taking some inspiration from the Family Court/Federal Circuit Court recent release for parents/carers on their website).

#1 - Follow existing arrangements and in particular court orders, as best you can, while you can. Strictly following court orders may no longer be possible; for example, the handover place you have been using is now closed. Many state borders are also closed. So, find a practical solution – a different place. Extra time next school holidays.

#2 – Have sensible conversations NOW - not only about your ability to comply with current orders; but what will happen in the event of a lock-down. Try to adopt a practical, “common-sense approach”, that keeps to the ‘spirit of the orders’; but most importantly always considering the safety and best interests of your children. The best outcome for your children is if you can work together to vary arrangements so that children maintain contact with each parent in a safe way.

Record any agreements about new parenting arrangements, in writing.

#3 – Try to understand the concerns of the other parent when negotiating new or revised arrangements. If you are proposing the other parent’s time with the child is restricted, unless they can understand your concerns, they will be opposed to what you suggest. Be mindful that your idea of what is ‘safe’ in this new world may not be the same as the other parent. What can you do to find a solution? If you are the parent who wants to keep the children with them, look at arranging extra contact with the other parent such as Skype, Facetime or telephone. Perhaps ‘make-up’ time could be considered, if appropriate.

#4 – Mediation is still a great option.  The court website advises that if parents are unable to agree, they can make an on-line application to vary existing orders. However - unless it is a case involving family violence, child abuse or is urgent, parents are still required to make a genuine effort to try and sort it out their dispute through family dispute resolution (mediation) before filing an application for parenting orders.

If you do file an application, don’t expect the court will be able to act quickly- except in urgent cases or where the court considers children are at risk.  The court is operating in very difficult circumstances and can only deal with priority matters.

#5 – Get advice. Not just from your Lawyer, but from health professionals, schools etc. Be up to date with the latest Government advice, it might have changed overnight.

Unfortunately, I foresee many situations arising where there will be no agreement, where one parent feels they have had a care arrangement imposed on them by the other parent. This is why it is important to talk about these issues now. You don’t want to be having these conversations in the panic of a lock-down. (At the time of writing this article there has been no such announcement but the indication is, it could happen).

Finally, a plug for the KEEP IT IN CAIRNS (#doitwithalocal) campaign.  Every single person in Cairns will have been affected by this virus. We all know someone who is now out of work. If we can spend every dollar locally, we help keep businesses open and locals in jobs.

Nardine Collier is a Nationally Accredited Mediator and has been mediating Family Law disputes for over 25 years. She is a Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner, a Family Law Arbitrator, a panel Mediator for various Australia wide organisations and for courts and tribunals. Nardine regularly mediates at Legal Aid conferences in Family Law, in Cairns and Alice Springs. She is also the Cairns Representative of the Queensland Chapter of the Resolution Institute of Australia.

Article written by Nardine Collier
Family Lawyer Cairns & Alice Springs

In times of crisis, parents need to work together. This means, making proper arrangements for children in the event of a lockdown situation. The information we are currently receiving is that it is business as usual in relation to court orders and parenting arrangements. In other words, parents should follow existing arrangements and in particular court orders, as best they can. Parents are encouraged to adopt a common-sense approach. As to what is a common sense approach, appears to differ between parents, and this is where disputes are arising.

We think that the best common-sense approach is for the primary carer to retain the children during a lockdown and be willing to offer make up time to the other parent, along with extra phone calls and/or Skype and Facebook communication. This of course depends upon each parent’s situation, the safety of the home and their ability to provide care for children during a lockdown. This is why we suggest the primary carer would normally be best placed to care for children over a two-week period, if children are in their care mostly in any event.

This does not mean the other parent could not take the children for two weeks, but it is most definitely a case by case basis.

For parents who share care, perhaps the common sense approach is that the children stay where they would normally be pursuant to court orders in the event of a lock down, with make-up time to occur at the end of the period.

There will inevitably be breaches of court orders during this period, but we doubt the court is going to be much interested in a flood of Contravention applications as a result. For this reason, we encourage our clients to try and reach an agreement about what might happen in the event of a lockdown, because if there is one- it will only be at short notice.

Here are some tips from the Family Law Section:

Nardine Collier is a Nationally Accredited Mediator and has been mediating Family Law disputes for over 25 years. She is a Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner, a Family Law Arbitrator, a panel Mediator for various Australia wide organisations and for courts and tribunals. Nardine regularly mediates at Legal Aid conferences in Family Law, in Cairns and Alice Springs. She is also the Cairns Representative of the Queensland Chapter of the Resolution Institute of Australia.

Article written by Nardine Collier
Family Lawyer Cairns & Alice Springs

I’ll set out what equal shared parental responsibility means in the Family Law Act:

“equal shared parental responsibility” means that parents must consult with each other and share responsibility for decisions about “major long-term issues” in regard to the children.

The phrase "major long-term issues" is defined in the Family Law Act as follows:

“issues about the care, welfare and development of the child of a long-term nature and includes (but is not limited to) issues of that nature about:

1. the child's education (both current and future); and
2. the child's religious and cultural upbringing; and
3. the child's health; and
4. the child's name; and
5. changes to the child's living arrangements that make it significantly more difficult for the child to spend time with a parent.

To avoid doubt, a decision by a parent of a child to form a relationship with a new partner is not, of itself, a major long-term issue in relation to the child. However, the decision will involve a major long-term issue if, for example, the relationship with the new partner involves the parent moving to another area and the move will make it significantly more difficult for the child to spend time with the other parent.”

To avoid doubt, a decision by a parent of a child to form a relationship with a new partner is not, of itself, a major long-term issue in relation to the child. However, the decision will involve a major long-term issue if, for example, the relationship with the new partner involves the parent moving to another area and the move will make it significantly more difficult for the child to spend time with the other parent.”

Consultation

“Consult with” is not defined in the Family Law Act but it has its normal meaning – “Speak to about” But what happens when the other parent is someone who doesn’t respond in a timely manner - or at all?

My suggestion is that in drafting consent orders, you might want to add a clause that says something like:

• for the purposes of consultation, you will advise the other party of a decision you seek to make relating to long term issues to do with parental responsibility. If the other party does not reply to you within 14 days, you will be able to proceed with that decision as if there had been consultation and discussion.

Article written by Nardine Collier
Family Lawyer Cairns & Alice Springs

Even though the family unit is no longer, it is still possible to have a happy ‘family’ after separation (it might even be a happier one!).

The key to a happy family, after separation- is good CO-PARENTING. I also think these tips apply to any family because as any parent/carer reading this article knows, it’s hard enough to parent at times, separated or not. Here are the five “C”’s to good co-parenting, noting that any reference to ‘parent’ is of course referring to anyone in a carer role.

#1: Conflict – getting rid of it

Children do not thrive after separation when parents are in constant battles with each other. A child who is caught up in the bitterness of their parent’s separation is at real risk of suffering psychological harm. I do believe good co-parenting does include conflict, but it is how parents go about managing and resolving their conflict that is all-important. I also believe it is good for children to know that Mum and Dad don’t always agree but they are able to discuss their differences of opinion in a good way.  How is it possible to do this? See #2!

#2: Co-operation - A business-like relationship

Try looking at your co-parenting arrangement like a business relationship. You know that you can be in business with someone you don’t particularly like. You and your business partner might not be friends, but in a good business partnership chances are you treat each other civilly and with respect. You both have a common goal, making your business successful. Business partners will co-operate with each other for that common goal; leaving aside their personal feelings for the other person.

For separated parents your common goal is the happiness, stability, and future well-being of your children. Parents who can put aside their hurt and anger, and co-operate for the benefit of their child, can create happy kids even after separation and will be much happier themselves.

#3: Communication

This is really the key to any successful relationship – good communication. Separated parents will need to work this out. HOW they will communicate? Face to face probably isn’t the best option all the time, so will it be by phone or text or email? There are a lot of new apps out there these days helping parents with communication, such as “Talking Parents”. Also work out WHY you need to talk, for what reasons. What decisions should you discuss jointly and what do you agree you can each decide on when the children are with you?

#4: Consistent parenting

This applies to all families separated or not. Children do best when they have consistency. For together parents this is a united front. For separated parents this means similar rules in each household – as to TV time, social media, jobs, bedtime, and so on.

#5: Consideration

Our wish for our clients here at Collier Family Law is that they can “Divorce with Dignity”. It is always a sad time but it doesn’t have to be soul destroying. It comes down to how parents choose to act and respond; whether they choose to act with consideration of each other, and mutual respect for each other’s role as parents.

Article written by Nardine Collier

Family Lawyer Cairns & Alice Springs

Mediation in Family Law matters is also referred to as Family Dispute Resolution (“FDR”). Before a person can make an application in the court for orders about children, there has to have been an attempt to resolve the dispute, by attending an FDR process (a mediation).

If you are invited to attend an FDR process, and you not wish to attend mediation, that is your choice. However, you should be aware that if a person fails to engage in an FDR requested by the other party, a certificate (called a s60I certificate) will be issued stating:

“The person did not attend FDR due to the refusal or failure of the other person or people to attend”.

If proceedings end up being filed in the court, the Court will be able to take into account a party’s refusal to attend FDR if there is an application for costs. It is possible that the Court will make an order for the other party’s costs to be paid by the person who refused to attend mediation; if the refusal to attend mediation increased the costs of the other party. In other words, they had to come to court because the other person in the dispute refused to try and resolve the dispute.

It is always a good idea to get some legal advice about the consequences of refusing to engage in an FDR process.

In most cases, mediation in family law matters is worth a try. There will be some cases where it isn’t appropriate, in which case the s60I certificate will reflect that the Mediator made the decision not to proceed. In that case, a person wouldn’t be at risk of a costs order.

Article written by Nardine Collier
Family Lawyer Cairns & Alice Springs

Let me tell you about a recent child inclusive mediation I attended. What a great process! But firstly – what is it?

Child Inclusive Practice involves children from say four years of age. They meet with a qualified Child Consultant who will talk to them about the dispute the family is involved in; for example -  their views;  and what they really think about the separation; with whom they want to live and how often and under what circumstances do they want to see the other parent.

The Child Consultant will then meet with the parents if the child says that is OK, to relay what the child has said. The parents would then go on to mediate the dispute, taking this information on board. Hopefully they will see their dispute through the eyes of their child.

It is very powerful to hear what a child has to say. What a child really thinks, not what they tell each parent. Understandably, parents in conflict find it hard to put their feelings about each other aside, when that happens the child gets lost in the conflict.

In the matter I recently had, Sally aged 7 (not her real name) said that when Mum and Dad argue she feels sad, lonely and scared. She chose a Bear card of a very sad looking bear indeed. When asked what it is like to go from one house to the other she chose a picture of a broken bridge, which was so long you couldn’t see the end of it, full of sharp rocks underneath. Pretty easy to guess how this little girl is coping with the separation.  Mum and Dad were very surprised by her comments as they both thought she was going Ok and were sure she hadn’t heard their fighting.

Is this a good process for everyone?
It’s a great process but only if:

• Parents are really genuinely interested in knowing what their child has to say, will accept it and will respect the child’s view;
• Parents are genuinely committed to resolving the dispute;
• Parents can be tough enough to hear what they might not what to hear

Most importantly, parents must be able to promise to NEVER EVER question/quiz/grill their children about what they said to the mediator. This has potential to cause great harm to a child who may find it extremely difficult to trust any sort of similar process ever again.

In expert hands, child inclusive mediation is something all parents in conflict might consider.

Article written by Nardine Collier
Family Lawyer Cairns & Alice Springs

I credit this blog to two amazing women I am lucky to know at the moment. Lucy Stokes who nags me to write blogs and then has the tedious task of posting them for me; and Laurie Pritchard who runs Small World Adventure Tours and who sits on the Cairns Business Women’s Club Board with me.

Laurie recently did a presentation about “the confidence con”, busting the myth that confidence comes from being good looking and /or wealthy. She says true confidence doesn’t comes from being beautiful or rich, but rather from doing something that’s hard. The achievement of something challenging (particularly when you doubt yourself) is the greatest confidence boost of all.

She told us of an African teaching called “Run towards the Roar”, a means by which African lions catch the antelope. The older lions with less stamina - and teeth! – waited on one side of the long grass. The younger, fitter lions waited on the opposite side. The older lions roared and the fearful antelopes ran away from the roar, but unknowingly, towards certain death where the younger lions waited. (Actually, it was probably the lionesses who came up with this strategy and did all the work!).

So, the elders said, “Run towards the Roar”! for there, is the greater chance of survival.

In other words, face your fears. If you can do this at every opportunity, that is what will build confidence and resilience.

Lucy’s message is “Eat the frog first”, which is a saying from a book written by Brian Tracy. OK, no-one wants to literally eat a frog, right? (unless we are French and the frog’s leg is cooked and smothered in garlic; or starving in the wilderness…but you get the picture). Lucy says, when faced with something you REALLY REALLY REALLY don’t want to do, is to just eat the frog. Do the unpleasant thing and get it out of the way. She uses this in the context of work. You know that task you have just been putting off? Get it out of the “too hard basket” and just do it. Eat that frog. Make it the first thing you do each day. (I have lots of frogs in my pond at times!).

How often, when finally we tackle an unpleasant job, do we find it actually wasn’t as horrible as we thought..?

So, what does this have to do with separation and Family Law?

Well, firstly, the message is to face your fear. Here are two scenarios you might relate to (or know someone who does).

Nardine Collier is a Nationally Accredited mediator and has been mediating family law disputes for 20 years. She is a Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner, a Family Law Arbitrator, a panel mediator for various Australia wide organisations and for courts and tribunals, and regularly mediates at legal aid conferences in family law, in Cairns and the Northern Territory. She is also the Cairns representative of the Queensland Chapter of the Resolution Institute of Australia.

Article written by Nardine Collier
Family Lawyer Cairns & Alice Springs

I recently read an Interesting article on news.com.au entitled;

“My partner’s ex-wife ‘stole’ my inheritance

A WOMAN has been forced to pay more than half a million dollars to her partner’s ex-wife after being trapped by a bizarre law.”

The lady in question (“Deb”) had met the love of her life (“Jim”). Jim had been previously married but believed his property matters had been sorted out with his former wife. (You can see what is coming, can’t you?) Deb got an inheritance and they bought a house. Jim then received a claim from his former wife seeking a property settlement, because it turned out that their property had actually never been formally resolved. The article says that “Deb” ended up losing half a million dollars including her inheritance as this had to be paid to Jim’s ex-wife.

This is a pretty extreme scenario, but what you do need to know is:

• The only way to formally settle property between couples after separation, so that it is legally binding, is by way of court orders (be that consent orders or by order of the court following a contested hearing) OR a financial agreement.
• Letters between you, or even a typed-up agreement, is NOT a binding agreement and is only evidence of what was intended. The court is able to make orders that are not what was agreed if the agreement reached was not “just and equitable” (these are the words in the Family Law Act).
• So – when you settle property matters, go the extra step and make sure you formalise the agreement.

The second problem poor old Deb faced was that by the time the property was divided as between Jim and his former wife, Jim now owned property with Deb, that was included in the property pool to be divided between him and his ex-wife. How can this happen?

This is because when the court comes to look at a property case, it looks at CURRENT assets and liabilities. Not what you had at separation (although that is important) but what you currently have. If there is a sufficient connection between the property you currently have, and the relationship, the court might include the current property, in the property pool of assets to be divided – even if you acquired the property after separation and own it with someone else.

Of course, there are many factors involved, but you cannot assume that the property you have with your current partner is ‘safe’ from a claim by your ex-partner. If this scenario bothers you, the best thing you can do is seek some legal advice as to how you might be able to protect your current assets – particularly if you are the “Deb” in your situation.

Article written by Nardine Collier
Family Lawyer Cairns & Alice Springs

What are consent orders for property? Is this something I need to consider?

Yes. If you have reached agreement with your former partner or spouse about your property, you most definitely should finalise it by way of consent orders. So – what are consent orders and what do you need to do?

What are “Consent Orders”?

When we say “Consent orders” we are talking about an application that is made to the Family Court asking the court to make orders in relation to property. There are two forms that are submitted. One is the Application itself, where you set out your details, list your property, and give the court information about relevant matters and what the division of property is going to be. The second document is what we call “Minutes of Consent Orders”. This document contains the actual orders you are asking the court to make – for example, “that the Husband transfer to the Wife his right title and interest in the former matrimonial home at 1 Brown Street..etc. “

But we agree – do I really need to bother with this process? I don’t want to go to court.

YES! You do!! Firstly, you don’t actually go to court, the orders are filed in the court but the Registrar will consider them in chambers without you having to attend. The Registrar will make the orders if he or she considers them to be “just and equitable” - i.e. a fair outcome taking into account the facts of your particular case.

By filing an application for consent orders, if the court approves them the orders become orders of the court just as if you went to court and the Judge decided after hearing your case. Once you have final court orders in place, in theory, no-one can come back for another go! As with everything there are exceptions to the rule of finality which I won’t go into here – you are fairly safe to assume that the final orders are just that and there will be no future attempts made by anyone, to alter the division of property. This means you can now get on with your life financially knowing that your future earnings and property are protected from any further claims.

The next good reason to have consent orders is that you can enforce the orders if necessary. For example, your ex refuses to sign the transfer of title for the house. You can ask the Registrar of the Family Court to do so, if you have those orders in place. If your ex is supposed to pay you money for your share of the house and they default, court orders allow you to have the property put on the market and sold.

The other advantage is that if you have a court order, you are exempt from stamp duty if you are taking over the title in the house.

Can I prepare a consent order myself?

You can certainly download the form from the Family Court website – it’s called an Application for Consent Orders. You will be able to fill in a lot of the form yourself, and the form has a very helpful section at the start which explains the form and how to fill it in.  However, just about everyone I speak to tells me that there are sections of the form that they are just not sure about. If the form is wrong, the Registrar will often not make the orders sought, so you have to get it right. Then there is the second document, the actual orders themselves. It is VERY important to get this right and to ensure that you have all the necessary orders to protect your interests. You will struggle to find a precedent online and every case is different, so the precedent you might find, may not suit your case.

It really is best to get some legal advice. At Collier Family Law we are happy to work with you as a “DIY…WOH” 😊 DIY – as in, you fill in as much of the form as you can to save our time (which is your money) but “with our help” – we check the form for accuracy and make sure all the necessary orders are in there, correctly worded.

What does it cost?  

There is a court filing fee of $165. You may be exempt if you hold certain government concession cards or can demonstrate hardship. The legal fees for preparation can vary depending on how complex the document is and how much of it we do for you, but we will give you that estimate at an appointment.

Can I get a final agreement any other way?

Yes, you can enter into a financial agreement. The process is quite different however and you must obtain legal advice before thinking about a financial agreement, as to whether the consent orders process is a better option.

Article written by Nardine Collier
Family Lawyer Cairns & Alice Springs

I thought this was an interesting idea...

The Sydney Morning Herald recently published an article (12/9/18) entitled “Divorce hotels are coming to Australia”. That article states:

“The premise is simple: couples check in to a hotel in two separate rooms for two nights, where they undergo mediation processes behind closed doors and away from outside responsibilities.

The idea is that, over the course of a 48-hour hotel stay, all divorce arrangements can be made.”

A couple were quoted as saying that it worked for them as it means they could get away from commitments and day to day obligations (such as children, they said! Ha ha) and really focus on their ‘divorce’ (by which, they meant, their property settlement and possibly arrangements for children.)

“The CEO of DivorceHotel, Jim Halfens developed the idea in the Netherlands around seven years ago and the company is now operating in the US and the UK, with an Australian expansion planned for 2019.

His idea involves providing all the professional support a couple need to arrange their divorce (“lawyer, mediator, financial advisor, maybe therapist”) all under the same roof at the same time.”

The article is quick to point out that this idea wouldn’t suit everyone and would only work if couples were amicable.

It’s definitely an interesting idea and I can see how it could be adapted to be more affordable. Much as I’d love my client to pay for me to stay at a swanky hotel for 2 nights, that might be out of the reach of many; and really, not necessary.

The idea of all the necessary players, such as the mediator, lawyers, accountants, financial planners, etc getting together in one place is not new. “Collaborative law” is a concept where the parties do just that. Collaborative law in its pure form has other rules and restrictions which doesn’t appeal to me, but the idea of everyone being accessible AND trying to get things done in a focused time-limited process, is a great idea.

How about this:  DIVORCE DAY (AKA “D-Day”)

• Choose a family law mediator.
• Both engage lawyers for this process
• Have the mediator and the lawyers negotiate and agree a schedule of dates – i.e. the date by which all documents have to be exchanged by, valuations obtained, etc, so that by the time D-Day rolls around you both know what your assets and liabilities are and have received advice as to what is a just and equitable outcome.
• Arrange any other participants such as accountants, financial planners, mortgage broker, etc.
• Book a neutral venue – the Boland Centre in Cairns is excellent.
• Set aside the day and make appropriate arrangements.

You might both agree that you will not leave the venue until the matter is finalised. In which case…maybe you will need that room after all?